Friday, thank goodness you are here. I know for me, this week was a struggle. The work is piling on, the homesickness is settling in, and the weather is NOT helping. Now I know that we are all in different phases of life, but we can all relate to the overwhelming feeling because at the end of the day it boils down to one thing….stress. Stress looks different for so many of us, but feels all the same. So while we are all in completely different places in our lives, the beauty of our struggles is they are what connects us. I think emotions were demanded to be felt so that on some level, we could all get through our struggles, side by side, hand in hand, heart by heart. The problem that we run into is the idea that we somehow need to hide these struggles, these moments of stress, these spirals that we might go on from time to time.
I am guilty of it just as much as anyone else, and I think it is important that we acknowledge it and realize that we are not alone. I often find it hard to be the “real me” all the time. And when I say that, I don’t mean not staying true to myself, but rather expressing myself, fully and truthfully. I think, for a lot of us, we are so used to being surrounded by happy and positive things at all times. We feed off good vibes and love. We try to radiate all of these things, and while it is an amazing thing to do, we all know that we will not be this way every second of every day. I know personally, I struggle with letting myself seem anything less than happy, because that is what I preach. That is what I stand for. That is who I am to all of you. But life gets real. Emotions hit us hard. And when that happens it is hard to see the light, to feel the love, and to see the true meaning of what is happening. I remember on Tuesday I nearly lost it. You know, that overwhelmed spiraling feeling that overcomes you and is accompanied by thoughts racing through your head a million miles a minute. You think it will never end, you can’t see the silver lining, and you throw yourself a little pity party. You’re not sure what to do, you’re embarrassed to ask for help, and instead of doing whats best for you, you do the complete opposite. You blame yourself for getting to this point. You tell yourself that you’re a failure. You reject any and all help. And before you know it, you are drowning in a pool of self-hate, rather than swimming in a pool of self- love. We all know this. And we all know that this is not the answer, but our pride, our image, our reputation is all that matters to us in these moments. You want to send the text, you want to make the phone call, you want to let the tears flow, but your thoughts get the best of you. “What will they think?” “I shouldn't bother them, they are busy” “Suck it up and deal with it later, there is no time for this!” But that is where we must stop. Send the text. Make the phone call. Let the tears fall. Because the more we suppress these feelings, the more we ignore them, the further and further we move away from who we are striving to be.
At the end of the day, we are all only human. We are all facing a battle that no one knows about, and we all would be lying if we said we weren’t. I think that we need acknowledge that there are people who seem to have it all together, all the time, and the reality is they don’t. It’s a puzzling concept to comprehend because think about it. We walk into the studio, our safe haven, and we see smiles. We see laughter. We see success. We think and we assume, but we do not know. And that is where we need to work on things. Because although we see all these things, there are so many things that we don't see. Like the instructors doubts on if their class will be a success, if it will reach people. Or the tears that hit the floor in the dark spin room. And all the comparisons from one person to the next. Positivity is a great thing, except when we use it as a mask to hide our true selves.We need to be who we are when no one is watching when people are watching. And luckily, we have people who will help us do this. People who get it. People who won’t judge us. People who will show up and be there for us. So, from now on, we are going to be real. We are not going to think we are burdens, but rather blessings. We are going to wear ALL our emotions, even the ugly ones. And we are going to grow to new heights together, one step at a time. I know it is hard, to be real, to feel those hard feels, to face those scary truths that we bury deep down inside, but when we do these things, we reach a new level of understanding of who we are. Because the more we let that side of ourselves be seen, the fewer times we see them. You all know her, the one who tells you these lies. Let her out. Share her thoughts. Tell her deepest secrets. Share your biggest fears. Break.Down.Those.Walls. in your heart and rebuild them with love. Life turns around when YOU turn on your heart.
“On the other side of fear, is the greatest things life has to offer.” Do the things that scare you. Jump into your fears. I promise you that this tribe will catch you if you fall and celebrate with you when you fly. But it all starts with deciding that YOU are worth achieving the best things this life has to offer. I love and miss you all dearly and want nothing more than to be home with all of you. Until then, sending confidence, love, and some peace of mind to all of you, wherever you may be!