Hi there tribe! Happy fall! I almost feel silly saying that because it is still sunny and hot out, but fall is among us. I know we will be wanting this warmth in a few weeks, so we should take a little bit of time and appreciate it while it lasts! But believe me, I am ready to pull out my sweaters, pick pumpkins, drink beers around bonfires, and do all the fall things. Like all things, it will come and patience is key. I thought that this was the perfect time to talk about how beautiful change is. I mean, mother nature is about to put on one of the most gorgeous shows ever. The earth will silently and without much notice go from green and bright to bare and dull. But in between that time, in the midst of the change, something beautiful happens. The leaves go through a transformation and send a breathtaking image into the world before dying off and leaving their mark for the year. Much like the leaves on the trees, the ways we change are so beyond beautiful, even if they are silent and without knowing.
Change is a funny word. Because in one sense it has this fear attached to it. It has commitment and structure and new scary things associated with it. But at the same time it represents hope and new beginnings. I thought about this and really caught myself in the middle of this question…is change good or bad? And I really pondered on it. I mean for some things I agree that if it isn't broken, then don't fix it. But then for others, change is the opportunity or the avenue to be better. So who decides if change is good or bad? When I asked myself that question, I almost kinda giggled to myself because the person who decides is the person who was thinking it. We decide if the changes we are making are good or bad. We decide how we perceive the new season of life we are entering. We decide whether or not we want to publicize the change or just do it. But the power is in our hands, and that is the important reminder.
I know that changes can be scary and nine times out of ten they are. Anything worth having isn't going to be easy, but just like the fall picture that gets painted in the sky, it is truly worth it. So I ask you…what could you change? what could you do to make your life better? Is it something small like taking 10 minutes for yourself in between the hustle and bustle? or is it something bigger like walking away from the corporate world to pursue your dreams? Whatever it may be, big or small, there is something you could do in your life to make it a little brighter.
Change comes in all shapes and sizes and wears many masks along the way. It can be hard to decide when the right time is to make all of these changes, but the longer we sit around waiting, the most time we waste. Because unfortunately there is no good time for change, unless we get to the point where change is the only option. And that is the scary point. When we have no choice but to do this big scary thing because we are so miserable we can’t take it anymore. Or we have let ourselves go so much that we are putting our health at risk. Or our relationship is so unhealthy the only option we have is to walk away. If you're reading this and feeling a little tug at your heart, close your eyes, figure out why that feeling is happening, and then embrace any changes you need to make that go away. Those are the red flags our heart and soul are sending out and it is time to grab ahold of them. Because while change is scary, it is oh so necessary, and even more beautiful. Funny, because so are you. You are oh so necessary and oh so beautiful. And its time to do things in life that reflect that mindset.
So decide today that from now on change is what we make it. It is neither good, nor bad, its not even somewhere in the middle. It just is and that’sall it has to be. When it gets hard, or scary, or dark and grey, remember your autumn is coming. Sooner or later the changes you make in your life will show you their beauty, and you will be standing there in awe. Do it for that moment…when the changes become beautiful. I promise, it will happen.
Until then, keep chasing after your dreams and fighting the daily battles life throws your way. And always remember how beautiful and necessary you are to so many in this life. You matter and I love you. Always and all ways.
Oh hey there TORQUE babes! It is a good day to have a good day so I think that is what we are going to do. I know the odds are against us with the date and the full moon, BUT I also know that the deciding factor to whether or not we have a good day is deep within ourselves. So we are gonna decide right now that today is going to be not only good, but great. AND tomorrow will be even better. I can’t even begin to explain how excited I am to celebrate our happy place. Three years. HOW??? How did that happen. I can’t even believe it because it feels too short but at the same time I can’r remember life before TORQUE, and I don’t think I am the only person who feels that way. It is an amazing place, with amazing people, with even more amazing energy. I don't think I will ever be able to put into words the amount of gratitude and love I have for the walls of this studio. I don't think I will ever be able to explain just what it has done for me. I don't know where I would be without it, without all of you. Sometimes it is easy to lose sight of just how amazing this place is. That is why days like tomorrow are so important. Yes they are supposed to be fun and happy, but they are also what I like to call stopping and smelling the roses. Anniversaries, birthdays, special times are when we get to really focus on something or someone that has impacted you. Everyone who is reading this right now can say that this studio these people their message has in some way changed your life. Let’s just think about that for a second and be grateful. Like I said, I don't think there will ever be the right words to describe what this place is…but let’s try.
Home. This studio is simply home. People gather. They talk. They hug. They laugh. They smile. They love. Kids grow up here. In front of our eyes. People hang out before and after classes. Share a drink and long chats. Order food and sit criss cross apple sauce on the floor and they share bites of each. People feel that this place is somewhere that they belong. Somewhere they can be. Somewhere they are loved. This place is home and it always will be.
Pure magic. I mean have you talked to some of the people here?? The stories. The Pain. The struggles. The divorces, miscarriages, sickness, money troubles, parenting, death, addiction, etc. All those things were left at the door when they came in contact with TORQUE. The positive shield that this place has makes little to no room for those things. This place heals big wounds. It makes you dig deep. Feel the pain. Cry the tears. Work through it. And then…it wraps you in love. Holds your hand. Walks with you. And watches you fly. This studio knows the deepest and darkest most painful secrets we have ever had and somehow has turned those things into beautiful people with even more beautiful hearts. Like I said, pure magic.
Unstoppable. This is just the beginning. 3 years will one day be 30 years. Best studio in Philly will one day be best studio in the US. This place has no limitations. It has big dreams. Big goals. Hopes and dreams. the whole nine. TORQUE is here to stay and nothing or no one is going to come in its way. As long as there are happy beats, smiling faces, and people dedicated to becoming a better version of themselves, the lights will always be on. The green hearts will still be flowing. And the people in this community will keep on growing. TORQUE is unstoppable and this is only the beginning.
So as we reflect and prepare to celebrate three amazing years of love, laughter, growth, and support I ask you to think about what TORQUE has done for you. Where has it taken you? What have you been able to accomplish with its help? Take some time and be grateful for this place and all the people who make it what it is. And then raise your glass, cheers, and do it again. This is TORQUE. And it’s just getting started.
Green Hearts for all, every single day…
Hi there babes! It’s Friday!!! Believe me, I am in my classroom right now, with 18 kids, doing a happy dance because the only thing that stands between us and the weekend is a few worksheets, recess, lunch, and a spelling test!!! It is almost here and another work week, school week, mom week, has come to a close and the weekend is upon US. We can do it people. So this post is all about loving ourselves. A topic we don't shy away from talking about, we sometimes veer off the path from time to time. I know we talk about it a lot, but I have a little bit of a different lens that I am looking through this time.
Loving yourself is a life long commitment. It is not something that grows overnight. The product does not come with 2 day shipping. And you can’t go to Target to buy it either. Why? Because loving yourself is not something that is tangible, it is a mindset. A mindset that we decide for ourselves. Yes, there are things that we can do to ACHIEVE that love, but we can’t grasp it and hold onto it. We can only feel it and eventually become it. Rita Pearson, a life long teacher, once said that if you say something enough it starts to become a part of you. I like that. Like really like that. So I started to do that. With this saying.. I love you, always and all ways. For a while I only said this to DJ because that was how I promised to love him. Forever and in any state. But then I thought to myself one day, damn, the is a pretty sweet deal. How great would it be if I loved myself that way. That thought came and went just as fast as all my other self care thoughts had gone. Until recently. Until I was dragging. Until I needed to start loving my self always and in all ways.
These past 2 weeks my life has been flipped upside down. It has been amazing and I wouldn't change it for the world, but it is exhausting. And I found myself struggling. I found myself empty. Tired. Cranky. Not motivated. Distant. All of those things. I realized it was because I had to figure out how to love myself in this new stage of life. Because forever is, well, forever, but forever doesn't have a broken down minute by minute agenda. But life does. So when we say we will love ourselves always we don't allow any room for flexibility. Yes I still loved my life and my accomplishments and who I was these past two weeks, but I wasn't loving the state, shape, or form I was in. I wasn't loving the day to day, but rather the big picture. And I think a lot of us get caught here. I know I do. We love the big idea. We love the main idea. But we lose sight of the details. I am starting to realize that the details are what make the love capable of being felt.
Loving yourself can be found in a multitude of ways. But knowing what you need (all ways) is key. When you’re tired and exhausted, the best way to love yourself is by listening to your body. When life is busy and stressful, the best way to love yourself is doing something for yourself. When you want to feel better about how you look or feel, the best way to love yourself is with patience. When you're frustrated and sad, the best way to love yourself is to feel. Loving yourself isn't always found in a workout, a manicure, or a weekend trip. It can be found in reading a book before bed, bubble baths, wine, naps, long walks, cry sessions, hugs, and sometimes just good old peace and quiet. It is not a matter of IF we love ourselves but rather are we going to LET ourselves love ourselves. That’s when the magic will happen. When we begin to have autonomy over what we need.
So I ask yourself today to promise me this. That you will love yourself fiercely and forever. That you will love yourself in all the different walks of life. That you will adapt to what you need in times of change and growth. And that no matter what, no matter how hard it gets, you will never ever stop trying. Because at the end of the day, love starts with you. Deep down in your soul, and then one person at a time, it changes the world. So I leave you with this now that you know what it means…love yourself, always and all ways.
I love you,
Goooooddmorrningg! Happy Monday everyone! I hope that you enjoyed the gorgeous weather this weekend and soaked up every last bit of summer that you could because the days are upon us. Yup, it’s here. School time. Whether you are the one getting on the bus, waving to someone on the bus, or sitting in traffic behind the bus, back to school takes a toll on us all. I thought this would be a great time to talk about all the amazing things that this time of year represents.
As some of you know, this is my first year teaching. This morning I will have the pleasure of meeting 18 first graders that are mine for the whole year. Mine to love. Mine to teach. Mine to watch learn and grow. And while I think of that, I can’t help but think of all of you. The ones who are saying goodbye. The ones who raised these kids. The ones who are struggling right now in some sort of way. Believe me, I am thinking of you and so are all the other teachers out there. Know that in your heart. Know that in your soul. Know that your baby, however big or small, near or far, old or young, will be okay. They will embrace this new stage of life and they will indeed, fly.
With that being said, I know that for some of you cannot wait for that bus to come. You have the mimosas ready to go as soon as you wave goodbye. I also know there are some of you who can barely bear letting those little faces get on the big bus and say goodbye to them for the day. And I know some of you are dreading hearing the alarm and being outside of the house before noon. But believe me, it will be okay. I know that this time of year holds many emotions, but like everything the first step is the hardest. We all know that school and growth and learning and friends are all good things, but we struggle with it. We dread the beginning, but then we end up loving it. I want you to remember that this week as you send them off to do what they are supposed to do, learn and be kids!
So, let this season be the season of change. Let this year be different. I want us to be excited about all the change. I want us to look at all the progress and growth and celebrate it. I want us to learn from out mistakes because well they are proof that we are trying. I want us to look at all of this as a positive instead of a sad story. This is life. This is your kids life. This is their childhood, their memories. This is the beginning of all their hopes and dreams. I always say every doctor and lawyer had to go to kindergarten. This is where it starts and that alone is why we should celebrate. So when they get off the bus, ask them about their day. Seek an interest in their education. Make it your business to know about their life. Support them in any and all ways you know how to. Trust me, it will be worth it.
In those anxious moments when you are wondering what they are doing, in those frustrating moments when they answer “fine”when you ask about their day, and in those heartbreaking ones as you realize your baby is no longer a baby anymore, remember that this is a new chapter of life. There will always be a sadness to leave some things behind, but the future is oh so bright. Be open and accepting to whatever is coming your way and embrace it. Hug them tighter, listen to the closer, love them harder, and let them go little by little. One day, you'll be looking at the amazing person they are and you'll be so proud and grateful that you did. You can do this mama, I promise. And just remember, they always come home looking for love. Don't forget that.
I love you and feel for you. It will all be okay, believe me. It will.
Hi there, it’s me. Yes me, but also you. Im the voice inside your head, your heart, and your soul. We are finally speaking up because it is about time you listened to what we have to say. I know there is never any time to listen, but I ask you to just try to tune the rest of the world out for a few minutes and just listen. What I have to talk to you about is something that you struggle with. It is something you get impatient with. It is something that you want to give up on and forget about. And I am here to show you what all your doubts and all your fears about this topic really mean.I know you are probably sitting there thinking there is no way that whatever I am about to say will relate to you, but believe me it will.
I know there are things in your life that you wish you could work through. The things you wish didn't happen. The things you wish didn't happen. The exes, the divorces, the heartbreaks, the career changes, college, daycare, debt, loans, you name it, we all have it. There are these things that we wish we could wash our hands of and get rid of, but we can’t. I know these are things that we work on every day, but in the big picture our efforts seem so miniscule. The pain doesn't get any better, the balance doesn't get any lower, our confidence doesn't get any higher. And we start to feel stuck. We feel like our hands our tied. That we aren't going anywhere. That moving forward and towards the future seems so far away and not something we will ever be able to attain. And that is where I come in. This is where its time for your soul to speak.
What I have to say to you is speed has no significance in this equation, but direction does. It does not matter how fast you go, how slow you go, how many breaks you take, how many bursts of energy you get. None of it, zilch, zero, none of it matters. But what does, is that you keep moving forward. So if you get a burst of energy, a blast of motivation, a desire to make a change, make sure the direction of all of that energy is forward. If you need to take a break, make sure you put the emergency break on and do not reverse. You don't need to be in forward motion every single second of your life, but the important thing to remember is that with every action, intention, and move you make that it is one that is in a positive direction. Don't let the negativity that this world has make you move backward. At these times, just hold on tight and know that it will get better, you will get stronger, and before you know it you'll be walking towards those moments that benefit you in the long run.
So the point of this little chat is I don't want you to give up. I know it feels like at times the pain and heartache, the debt and bills, the confidence and whatnot is not improving, but believe me it is. It slowly but surely is. It is important to realize that growth and healing do not happen before our eyes, but is the midst of life itself. What we cannot see in the moment will become clear one day, and then it will all make sense. So not matter what it is you are struggling with, know that if you're walking forward, at whatever pace, you're doing an amazing job. Some days will be better than others, but I promise you, there will be a day, when it all comes together. That is the finish line my friends That is what we are all walking towards. And as I have said many of times before, at the end of the day we are all just walking each other home. I’ll hold you hand if you hold mine and we can walk there together. You ready? Let’s go. Fast or slow, it doesn't matter, as long as we keep walking together. We got this. You got this. I believe in you. And now its time for you to believe in you.
With all my love and support,
The voice inside your head saying yes.you.can.
Hello hello my lovely ladies! How are you guys?! It’s been a little while since the last women crush Wednesday, but have no fear we are BACK! And this one is straight fire. I mean not only is she a total smoke show, she is a kick ass instructor on the bike, and an even better person to us all. Miranda Brewer found her way to the studio through her sister in law, our beloved, Kate. Once she was introduced she was hooked. Taking classes became a normal thing for her. But that wasn't enough. Her passion and dedication brought her to the stage, to lead all of us through those 45 minutes for us. And damn, is she good at what she does. She brings a whole new level of sass, beauty, and flavor to the stage. One that is enticing and inspiring. I know for a fact she will do amazing things. This women crush, as they all do, came at the right time for Miranda. Today marks a new chapter for her. While she leaves her 20’s behind and says hello to her 30’s, she is entering into this new chapter with so much positive, love, and exciting things ahead of her. This year is going to be her year, I just know it. So today we celebrate Miranda. We celebrate the beautiful person she is inside and outside. We celebrate the good energy and vibes that she brings into the studio. We celebrate the creativity and inspiration that she sends out into the world. We celebrate our girl, for all that she is and all that she will be. Happy Birthday, beautiful know that you are our #wcw every damn day! We love you!
To read more about Miranda and her love for the studio, keep reading! As always sending so much love and happiness to you all wherever you may be! And p.s. give this birthday babe some loveee!!
Definition of TORQUE:
Torque is about forever inspiring the members of our tribe both as clients and instructors. We gather in our sanctuary to push ourselves just a little harder and reach just a little farther. TORQUE has exposed me to so many talented, intelligent, beautiful people that have and will continue to teach me new things about life and myself each and everyday. Most importantly, I think that Torque celebrates the individuality and the personal victories of all the members of our tribe and is truly committed to helping everyone further themselves in their personal journeys both in and out of the studio. My favorite memory at TORQUE to date was riding on stage with Kate Brewer in her final weeks of her first pregnancy. Not only do we as best friends have an incredible connection on stage but it was really awe inspiring to watch her kick butt while 9 months pregnant. #GOALS
Favorite quote and what it means to you:
“If you light a lamp for someone else it will also brighten your path”- Buddha I don’t want to over complicate something that is so beautifully simple in concept. This quote is a wonderful reminder that we have so much power in life to positively impact the people around us every single day! Smile at a stranger, give the compliments you are thinking in your mind, let your light shine!
Favorite workout clothing:
I am so not creative when it comes to my workout swag! You will forever find me in solid black pants and the same Lulu lemon swiftly tech t-shirt (legit have it in every color). ALWAYS taking suggestions for functional sports bras- help a girl out
Favorite post workout snack:
I am the worst most RANDOM eater. No internal time clock breakfast for diner pizza for breakfast kind of thing going on. If I had to choose my favorite post workout snack/meal I would have to say a trenta black iced tea from Starbucks- two pumps of sweetener ( they usually use 8) and a splash of lemonade with a cucumber avocado roll from Wegmans loaded with Wasabi and enjoyed on my commute home on 422 LOL-
Miranda’s Top Songs:
Last Hurrah- David Guetta
You Need to Calm Down- Taylor Swift
ME!- Taylor Swift
My Type- Sweetie
Self Control- Bebe Rexha
Cross Me- Ed Sheeran
Remember the Name- Ed Sheeran
You Come First- Zak Abel
Never Really Over (R3HAB remix)- Katy Perry
Pure Water- Migos
Good as Hell- Lizzo
I Like it- Cardi B
Hot Girl Summer- Megan The Stallion
I have more pets than I can even count!- Everything from horses to miniature donkeys and three legged cats!
I live to cook and am constantly in the kitchen- no like its actually an obsession-
My brother is married to my best friend in the entire world who is ALSO a TORQUE instructor and taught me so much about preparing a kickass class.
So the other day I was on my way to the beach to have some much needed time with my bestie, Beth. Dj was getting on an airplane to Arizona for a golf trip. It was the perfect long weekend for the both of us. Things were good. I was getting the last few things together to put into my car and then I was on my way. The sun was shining and the sky was clear. I got into my car, turned the music up loud, put my windows down, and was off. That feeling is one of the best. Leaving and knowing that so much fun lies ahead of you. So I am driving and I realize that about an hour into my drive, the gas light goes on. So I get off at the next exit and follow the signs to the gas station. As I am driving I thought it would be a good idea to turn the music down so it wasn't on full blast as I pulled into the gas station and thank you GOD that I did. I pulled up to the pump, slowed down, and heard the most terrible, high pitched screech that I ever heard in my entire life. I mean this was so loud that people were looking at me in the gas station. I was immediately, and I mean IMMEDIATELY annoyed. I got out, pumped the gas while a hundred and one thoughts were going through my head, put the gas cap on, and called my dad. All while this was happening I was texting DJ, who is about 30 minutes from boarding somehow blaming this on him. I know, makes no sense right? So I’m talking to my dad and he said I was not to drive it down the shore and I had two choices….to get it fixed or to go home and get it fixed. You can imagine that neither of those options were ones that I wanted to hear. Frustrated me looked up a garage, played the “it’s fine, I’ll deal with it card” and shut everyone out. Everyone being the ones who were doing there best to help me. So I got to the garage. They said my brakes were metal to metal and that they weren't able to do it for a couple of hours. That didn't settle well with me so I thanked them kindly and was on my way tot he next garage which my dad had found and made an appointment for me while I was “dealing with it”. I pulled up, signed the papers, grabbed my charger and water bottle out of the car, and waited until my car was drivable. Which was about 4.5 hours later on the side of the highway at some garage in Chester.
During that time, I was a basket case. I sat there crying, angry, frustrated, and throwing myself what I like to call them “Eeyore” parties. Feeling all sorry for myself and blaming everyone and everything for this mishap in my life. As if it was the end of the world. I was so beyond bitter at the situation. I was bitter that DJ was getting on a plane, as if he wanted this to happen. I was bitter that I was going to have to pay for this, as if it was ever going to be free. I was bitter that instead of laying on the beach in the sun I was sitting in a crappy car garage. I was bitter and it didn't make this situation any better. If anything, it made it worse. A lot worse. The problem with these situations, the ones where bitterness is the sweetest solution, is that you're the only one who cant see how minuscule these things are. To Beth, this was just a few extra hours without me being at the beach. Something so small right? But to those that are in the thick of it, it’s the world saying you thought but not this time. We make it so personal. We make it so negative. We make these natural, unplanned, bound to happen situations a part of some greater plan that our past wrongdoings have brought us. And that is where we go wrong. That is where we need to stop. These are the moments where we stop being bitter and we, in fact, become better.
I thought for days after how when it was over, it was like it never happened. That in and of itself told me how little and normal of a thing this was. These are things that are going to keep happening and its time to learn how to make the best out of the situation. So I sat there and thought what was the good? If I were to have to do it again, what would I do differently. The first thing I thought of was how I reacted. How I treated the people I loved. It is so easy for us to become bitter and spiteful towards the ones we love when stress is high. So how do we control that in these times? Well I think it comes from understanding what they are feeling. Which is mostly helpless and upset that they cant be there with you. Also, remembering why you called them in the first place. You didn't call them to unload all the anger you have, you at the root of this called them for help. So let them do just that. The other thing I thought of was to think about what could have happened if I DIDN’T get this fixed. The reality is I could have never made it to the beach altogether. I could have been in an accident on the highway or stranded in a place with no garages around. These things happen when they are supposed to for a reason and although in the moment it is so hard to remember that, it is really important to try. Finally, the last thing I would have done differently is I would have breathed a little more and yelled a little less. I would have tried to handle this with class rather than sass. I would have tried to see the bright side. Been thankful for the people who did help. And realize that its not a bad life just a bad day, or hour.
When these situations happen it is so easy to become bitter. Because they do suck. They usually aren’t fun. And 9 times out of 10 they are the last thing you want to be doing. But if we start looking at them as opportunities to become better, in all senses, then we have killed this with kindness. I know there will be more tough days ahead and there will be times when I fall to being bitter instead of better, but having the awareness to try and see the positives in these situations are the first step. I ask all of you to look at hardships, hard times, tough cards, and confusing roads as an opportunity to grow positively. That is where true change happens. When you can take the sourest lemons in a situation and make it into the sweetest of lemonade. And then later add some vodka to it because you deserve it!! We can do this tribe, I know we can. It won’t always be easy, but it is always going to be worth it! And that is a reason enough to do it! So here we go, remember don't get bitter, get better.
XO, love you!
Gooood morning loves! How are you? I hope everyone is enjoying the sunshine wherever you may be in this world! Summers are a great time of year because they are full of adventures, new memories, and so much fun. But with that comes the stress of being here and there and everywhere. I know that feeling just as well as the next. I encourage you to be present in all of your endeavors this memory making season and know that everything will work out. The house will feel like home, the suitcases will be put away, the school supplies will be bought, there will be food in the refrigerator, so just enjoy the hustle and bustle right now and know that everything else will fall into place exactly how it should. But since we are all on the go I thought a playlist would be perfect. Whether this accompanies you during a car ride to the beach or you download it and listen to it on a plane or you just jam out to it at the pool or on the patio, this playlist is for you. It’s the soundtrack to the memories that you are making. So, get the speaker or the headphones, crank up the volume, and let this become part of your memories. Everything is always better with a little music. So TORQUE babes, enjoy these last few weeks of fun and sunshine. It’s a beautiful time of year to travel around, reconnect as families, visit friends, try new things, and take a much needed break from the day to day. I promise you it’s all going to be back to normal soon, so SOAK IT UP! And don’t forget to snap a pic in your favorite TORQUE swag so we can go along with you on your adventures wherever they may take you!
All my love, sunshine, and happy vibes to all of you wherever you may be!
Good morning and happy Wednesday to some of the most beautiful souls! I know that this weather is seriously getting old and at this point all I want is some type of sunshine. Remember, flowers won’t grow without rain, I guess we are all going to bloom very soon, and how beautiful it will be when it happens. I have been thinking about what I would blog about next for a couple of days. And of course, the way it always happens, the topic found its way to me. I was scrolling through Instagram and came across this quote. Not only was the picture aesthetically pleasing, but the quote was just as soothing for the soul. This message is something that is really important for all of us to hear. It is something we all struggle with. And something that we all need to be broken down for us. The quote was simple, it reads, ‘Make your heart the prettiest thing about you.”
I know, it seems simple, but how many of you read that and then felt something inside you. Whether it was a sinking feeling, butterflies, a little bit of sadness, or a smile, you felt something when you read it. I always associate feelings with reality. If you feel it it must mean something. And, luckily, you are correct on this one, because this, it means everything.
So what does this mean? How do we make our heart pretty? Well, I think it starts with our actions. It is also found in our tone of voice. It is seen in our attentiveness. It can be felt with going the extra mile. Notice how all of those are things that we cannot apply to our face, buy at the store, or go to a salon for? That is the point people. This idea of making your heart beautiful is not something that can be bought. It is something that you find well within your soul and allow it to become who you are. That saying that true beauty shines from within could not be more appropriate for this time. But I know that this is not easy. Most of us WANT to be that person with a beautiful heart, but we struggle. So, I ask again, how do we do this?
I want you all to close your eyes right now and imagine someone who has a pretty heart. Think about how that person acts. How do they greet you? How do they look at you when you are talking? How do they react to your stories, accomplishments, failures, and struggles? How do they check in on you? I want you to think of all of those things and think about how they make you feel about yourself. And then I want you to think what your perception is on that person. I can 100% guarantee that you are not thinking about their make up, or their hair, or even the clothes that they wear. Because while those things are beautiful and make people who they are, this type of beauty that we are craving and acknowledging, surpasses mascara, nail color, or pair of jeans. THAT is the message here. That is the whole point. We need to strive for the beauty that makes our soul smile. The real stuff. That’s what we are walking towards. Because when you take all those other things away, one thing remains. You and your beautiful heart. And as I have said many times before, you truly only need one thing in this life…a beating heart. So remember that as you keep walking and working towards the most beautiful, healthy, happy version of you. It all starts within and everything we need, we already have. So, let’s get to it.
As always, sending love and hugs,
Hi there love bugs, I hope all is well. This topic today that I am writing about today is something that is really important to me and something I think will relate to the majority of you as well. I am not at the stage of life where I have been blessed with children of my own yet, but I do have some kiddos that I get to call mine. So, in some sense, I am able to speak on this topic, just through a different lens. As some of you know, I am a new teacher. This fall I will walk into a classroom with 20+ little humans and start one of the most important years of their lives, first grade. The pressure I feel and the anxiety I have is immense. I imagine that it is a fraction of what new parents feel as they are expecting the arrival of their bundle of joy. Things like, “will I be able to teach them anything?”, “are they going to know how to read?”, “will they be happy?” are racing through my head. And I sit here thinking what is the best way to make sure that they learn, grow, smile, laugh, and have fun? I have turned to scholarly articles, TED Talks, podcasts, and real parents for advice on how to get kids from point A to point B; however, those of you that work with children know there is no direct route.
Today, I want to share a common theme that all of my research and education has touched on. Something that goes beyond the classroom and teachers… It has to do with what is said and done around the dinner table, in the car rides home from sports games, the night before a big recital, the reactions to papers and tests. These are the moments that shape little humans. Our words, our actions, our reactions, and our next steps are what matter. No surprise, right?
I was listening to a podcast and it talked about how ‘our children become what we say to them.’ Now for all the mommies and daddies out there, along with aunts and uncles, babysitters, teachers, grandparents and more, listen because this is important. We have a huge responsibility. One that you all know and think about probably daily…One of our biggest and most amazing privileges in life is raising these kids to be smart, successful, happy, honest, hardworking, loving, and kind individuals. Thats a long list of things to accomplish, and none of it is on a shelf at Target available to purchase. So how do we get there? Through our words, actions, and reactions.
Children are like sponges, they absorb every single ounce of anything that is available to them. So if we give them negativity, self doubt, low self esteem, anger, disappointment, and stress, that is what they will absorb. The amazing thing about this though is it is a two way street. They will also absorb positivity, self love, confidence, patience, excitement, happiness, joy, and perseverance. So what are we giving them? That is my question to you. Think back to a time with your child when they failed, something that they have probably done 100 times before and will do 100 times again, how did you react? What were your words? What actions did you take?
Every action, word, and reaction we have towards a child makes an impact on how THEY perceive the situation. So if they lose a baseball game, even one they should have won, and we react by yelling and getting upset, how does that make them feel? What does that make them think? If they bring home a test that they studied all night for and they didn't do so well on it, and then we punish them, what does that do to their perception of themselves? These are the important moments that shape their perception of the world and themselves. These are the times that we need to over-flood that sponge with positivity. These are the times that we set them up for what we hope and dream of them becoming. Because our kids are what we say to them. They are OUR words in a living and able body.
So how do we want them to grow? I know personally that this is the toughest pill to swallow. Admitting that there have been times where I was the reason they absorbed self doubt or anger. And I'm here to tell you it is okay, because we are not all perfect and that is a teachable moment in and of itself. But luckily, we have a lifetime to teach them. So I’m asking you today to think about how we want to fuel those little minds. Remember, every action, word, and reaction we have towards them makes an impact on how THEY perceive the situation. We have a big responsibility here, but I know we can do it - as teachers, parents, family, friends, and a community. I have faith in the power of positivity, love, and the goodness of this tribe. I know that we all have been that “person,” but I also know that we are sweating alongside each other to be the best we can be, for not only ourselves, but for those little ones we impact as well.
So take this today as a reset. Remind yourself right now, that they are watching, listening, and taking it all in at every moment. And instead of putting on a show for them, transform your life and mindset to shape theirs. It is a win-win for all of us. Too much love is still not enough, so love them and love them hard. Remember what we always say, what we put in is what we get out. Imagine what amazing humans beings we will be raising when we fuel them with love and positivity.
And just because I know some of you need this, believe me, you are doing a kickass job. You are a great parent, aunt, uncle, grandparent, teacher, mentor, friend. Just keep loving, it is the secret medicine to heal all wounds. We got this TORQUE tribe!!
All my love,