Which cup is yours?

Good morning TORQUE tribe! Happy Wednesday, I hope the week is going well. So this blog has taken me a little while to figure out. I have had these two ideas floating around in my head and I couldn’t figure out how they were supposed to intertwine. I thought on it and I think I got it. The last few weeks I have been seeing things about giving from an empty cup and whatever is in your cup, will come out of your cup. So much about a cup. But who is with me?? I feel like this message has been floating around Facebook and Instagram a lot lately. Probably because it holds a lot of truth for the trying times we are in. But then I started to think of them as one idea. Giving from an empty cup and the cup spilling over, and they began to contradict each other. How can a cup spill if it is empty?? And I think I figured out where that contradiction comes from. Stay with me as I explain.


Giving from an empty cup implies that nothing in your life is done to fill you up. Meaning, you constantly are giving to others, doing for others, showing up for others, but you don’t do the same for yourself. You are on the back burner and your cup is empty. But then on the other hand, we have a cup that is full and when it spills out, whatever is in it comes out. Now, the way you read this matters. But I would think that the majority of us read that scenario, ya know the Facebook one, where the cup is full and someone bumps into them and the coffee spills along with the frustration of it spilling. And the assumption now that we associate with “the cup spilling” is negative. It assumes that what is in our cup, is negative. It’s hateful. It’s annoying. It’s frustrating. It’s painful. It is the furthest thing from sunshine and rainbows. Because if the cup is empty and it has to spill, the only thing coming out of it can’t be anything good?? Am I right? So what do we do about our cup that is constantly empty but when it’s full it spills all over and is a mess (literally and figuratively) to clean up? We spill it on purpose. Yep, you read that correctly.


Sometimes, we need to reset. We need to plan painful emotional work through it sessions. We need to go into the spin room with the idea of leaving the thoughts there. We need to sprint on that treadmill and leave the problems in the dust. We need to hang up the feelings on the tree outside the house before walking in. We need to be purposeful on how we empty the cup. Make time for the pain. Make time for frustration. Give yourself a set amount of time to feel the feels. To sit in the hate. To replay the regrets. And then, when that time is up. Be done. Empty the cup. Spill it. Kick it. And let it the eff go. Once we do that, we have an empty cup, but this time, we fill it. The same way we emptied it. Planned and purposely. Find things that make you feel good. It could be spin. It could be barre. It could be a bubble bath. Quiet time with your lover. A movie. A walk. A book. Music. Whatever. It. Is. Do it!!! Fill the cup. Make a plan, put it in the calendar, and commit to it. Watch your cup fill up with love, confidence, happiness, laughter, light, and reassurance.


This is a much better cycle to be addicted too. Giving from a full cup and when it spills, the only bad thing that happens is the world gets more love. Which, we could use just about as much as we can get these days. So make a promise to yourself, right here and right now, that you are going to empty the cup. You’re going to start fresh. And you’re going to be purposeful in how you fill it. Let your actions fill you up. Don’t let them tear you down. And the biggest part of this...the choice lies within you. You can and you will. And when you do, the world will shine a little brighter and you will live a little fuller (no pun intended).


I love you all and love this journey we are on together. We can do this!


Xoxo,


Caroline